Thursday, June 21, 2012

Is it enough?

Is it enough to just be me?  Am I enough?  A friend and I were talking about this last weekend and discovered that we had both been through a similar struggle and decided that YES, we are enough, regardless of our situations.  Here are my views on this matter.

Is it enough to have just one child?  Is it enough to be a wife and not have any children?  Is it enough to work only in the home, regardless of how many children you have? 

Am I a good enough mom, even though I work outside the home?  Is part-time work enough?  What if I have to work overtime - is that "good enough" for my kids? 

Should I send my kids to day care? To public school?  Private school?  Home school?  Are any of these enough?
 If you are a foster parent - is taking one child at a time enough?  How many is too many if you work outside the home?  If you stay at home?  Is fostering enough or should I adopt?  Is adopting one child enough to make a difference in the world?

Am I pretty enough?  Thin enough?  Happy enough?  Do I have enough electronics or the right cleaning products?  Are we healthy enough?  Strong enough?  Caring enough?  Loving enough?

I could do this all day long, but I think you get the point. The answer to each question will depend on where God has put you and what your goals are...but YOU ARE ENOUGH.

I think men and women both ask "is it enough" and "am I enough" questions, but women tend to take it to another level.  We are all basically insecure, no matter how many other people tell us we are wonderful just the way we are.  This insecurity is not from God. 

I believe we are enough.  We are made by God, in His image.  He saved woman for last, to be the crowning glory of creation.  We are special, and more powerful than we realize.  God knows our purpose - to love Him and to love others.  We need to rest in that purpose, work towards that purpose, live with that purpose.  Everything else is negotiable.

Satan knows all of this too, however, and he knows our weaknesses, like how easy it is to convince us that we aren't enough.  Throughout history, women have been constantly underestimated and restrained, for Satan fears us.  If we were to each realize our full potential as God's daughters, the world would change.  Each time we ask "am I enough" and we don't look to God for the answer, the world will provide us its own answer: "NO".  You need this product, that car, this supplement, that diet, these clothes, that car seat....the list is endless!! Clever marketing convinces us that who we are isn't as important as what have or what we look like.  Don't buy the lie. 

We may want the things we see, and if that's a struggle for you, please consider finding a way to reduce your exposure to advertising (i.e. DVR shows and skip commercials, don't read magazines).

The sources that inspired this post today:

Inspiring post from Finding Joy about being "enough"

Point of Grace - story behind "Good Enough"
Point Of Grace – Good Enough  - song on Spotify

See Jamie Blog, on how some people feel "entitled to children" and her own struggles with this.

If you struggle finding purpose in your life, check out this blog series about the Proverbs 31 woman.  She is inspiring...yet if we look at her as a list to check off, we will fall short and feel even worse about ourselves.  Learn from her, then aspire to be the best "you"you can be...but don't beat yourself up!


  1. I appreciate your connection of media and dissatisfaction. I have found that to be a strong correlation in my own life. The more I look at "perfect" homes in magazines, the more I pin other people's fantastically creative ideas on Pinterest, the more I read parenting books about what "good" moms should be doing, the more I feel like I'm not enough. I used to think it was fun, relaxing, or even inspiring. Then I realized that I didn't feel refreshed or inspired. I felt inadequate and dissatisfied with who I was, what I had, and what I did.

    A mentor mom once passed along a profound piece of wisdom to me. "What my eyes do not see, my heart cannot desire." For me, I had to take a break from many different forms of exposure (primarily so-called window shopping, which usually turned into shopping shopping!) and get my heart back into balance.

    If moms are struggling, I encourage them to look at their day and try to pin down what is contributing to the feeling. Is it a group of people? A certain store you can't resist? A home decorating magazine? It might be worth it to take a short vacation from those influences and see how or if it changes your viewpoint!

  2. Oh yes, I suffer from this "am i enough" syndrome too. You are completely right about limiting media to help you feel more content. My own struggles come from the internet. I have a very hard time pulling myself away but it rarely makes me feel better. Thanks for sharing your ideas. Definitely something to think about.

  3. I actually meant to mention Pinterest as a potential problem. I don't have a comparison problem there, but I have seen many blogs to that effect. I do struggle with doing other things online (facebook games, anyone?) that encourage wasting time while making me feel like I'm being productive. So, for the 3rd time in the past few years I've blocked all games for at least the next 6 weeks. I was more stressed playing the games than if I just picked up a book instead!